25 Horror Films That Might Kill Your Sex Life
If you want to get lucky at the end of date night you might not want to watch these films, or it could spell a one way trip to https://www.hdpornvideo.xxx/?hl=pl once your date has gone home.
1. Rosemary’s Baby (1968)
Directed by: Roman Polanski
Written by: Roman Polanski
What it’s about: Pregnant Rosemary Woodhouse (Mia Farrow) becomes convinced that there’s something wrong with whatever’s growing inside her, and it’s all part of a conspiracy that includes her husband Guy (John Cassavetes).
What it’ll make you afraid of: Being betrayed by your partner into carrying the demonic spawn of Satan. Also, post-sex scratch marks will now have you questioning whether you actually did the deed with the devil.
2. The Last House on the Left (1972)
Directed by: Wes Craven
Written by: Wes Craven
What it’s about: Mari Collingwood (Sandra Cassel) is raped and murdered by escaped convicts. When the perpetrators show up at the door of Mari’s parents, Mr. and Mrs. Collingwood (Gaylord St. James and Cynthia Carr), seek revenge.
What it’ll make you afraid of: A blow job with teeth. To be fair, Weasel (Fred Lincoln) totally deserved it, but you’ll definitely think twice about where you put your penis — not that you shouldn’t already!
3. Don’t Look Now (1973)
Directed by: Nicolas Roeg
Written by: Allan Scott and Chris Bryant
What it’s about: After the drowning death of their daughter Christine, John (Donald Sutherland) and Laura Baxter (Julie Christie) take a trip to Venice, where they meet a blind psychic (Hilary Mason) who claims she can see Christine.
What it’ll make you afraid of: The inextricable link between sex and death. You might think you and your wife are finally moving past the death of your daughter, but you’ll later flash back to that passionate fuck-fest when you’re bleeding out.
4. Flesh for Frankenstein (1973)
Directed by: Paul Morrissey
Written by: Paul Morrissey
What it’s about: Baron von Frankenstein (Udo Kier) is obsessed with creating a master race to serve him, and he hopes the head of a lustful stable boy (Joe Dallesandro) will speed up the breeding process.
What it’ll make you afraid of: Being used — do you genuinely want to get down with that person, or are you being manipulated by a mad scientist? Also, rough sex can result in disembowelment, apparently.
5. Shivers (1975)
Directed by: David Cronenberg
Written by: David Cronenberg
What it’s about: Dr. Roger St. Luc (Paul Hampton) races to stop the spread of a parasitic organism that causes uncontrollable lust in its host and is passed from person to person by sexual transmission.
What it’ll make you afraid of: Getting seduced by anyone who seems overly into you, because, hey, that could just be the parasite talking. Then of course, once you’ve had sex with an infected person, you’ve got the creature inside you too.
6. Death Bed: The Bed That Eats (1977)
Directed by: George Barry
Written by: George Barry
What it’s about: A sentient bed eats people because, once upon a time, a demon had sex with a human woman on it and cried tears of blood onto the bed when he inadvertently killed her.
What it’ll make you afraid of: The bed. Seriously, you have enough to worry about just in terms of your partner, and now you have a brand-new fear that the bed you’re copulating on is going to literally eat you alive.
7. Maniac (1980)
Directed by: William Lustig
Written by: C. A. Rosenberg and Joe Spinell
What it’s about: Frank Zito (Joe Spinell) is a serial killer who wields a straight razor — he murders prostitutes and scalps them so that he can use their bloody scalps to adorn the mannequins he collects.
What it’ll make you afraid of: Anyone admiring your hair. If a guy at a bar uses your luscious locks as a conversation starter, he could be planning to literally nail your scalp to his favorite mannequin. You should already be afraid of strangers, clearly.
8. Friday the 13th Part II (1981)
Directed by: Steve Miner
Written by: Ron Kurz and Phil Scuderi
What it’s about: Jason Voorhees stalks and disembowels the counselors at Camp Crystal Lake that he considers responsible for his drowning — and the death of his murderous mother Pamela (Betsy Palmer).
What it’ll make you afraid of: Being impaled during sex. Literally. Beyond that, the entire Friday the 13th series is a good reminder that having sex instantly makes you a target for a slasher movie villain.
9. The Howling (1981)
Directed by: Joe Dante
Written by: John Sayles and Terence H. Winkless
What it’s about: After a traumatic experience, Karen White (Dee Wallace) is sent to a resort called The Colony to recover. Once there, she and her husband Bill (Christopher Stone) discover The Colony is rampant with werewolves.
What it’ll make you afraid of: Turning into a werewolf during sex. Or having your partner turn into a werewolf during sex. I mean, if it happens to both of you at the same time, you might be kind of into it, but lycanthropy is more than just kinky sex.
10. Cat People (1982)
Directed by: Paul Schrader
Written by: DeWitt Bodeen and Alan Ormsby
What it’s about: Irena Gallier (Nastassja Kinski) meets her brother Paul (Malcolm McDowell), who reveals that they are werecats who turn into panthers and maul their human mates.
What it’ll make you afraid of: Finding out the person you’re sleeping with is actually a panther. And then, you know, getting torn to shreds. Sure, they’re gorgeous animals, but those claws and teeth make foreplay out of the question.
11. The Fly (1986)
Directed by: David Cronenberg
Written by: Charles Edward Pogue and David Cronenberg
What it’s about: Scientist Seth Brundle (Jeff Goldblum) is experimenting with teleportation when he accidentally merges his DNA with the DNA of a fly and begins to take on the fly’s characteristics.
What it’ll make you afraid of: Getting pregnant and giving birth to a giant maggot. OK, that’s just a dream sequence, but when you’re having sex with someone whose DNA has merged with a fly’s, you don’t really know what might happen.
12. Angel Heart (1987)
Directed by: Alan Parker
Written by: Alan Parker
What it’s about: Private investigator Harry Angel (Mickey Rourke) falls into the service of the mysterious Louis Cyphre (Robert De Niro), through which he uncovers a complex conspiracy and dangerous voodoo magic.
What it’ll make you afraid of: Mickey Rourke. Also, chickens. These are things that don’t occur during average sexual encounters, but — like voodoo — they pop up when least expected with horrifying consequences, and a lot of blood.
13. They Live (1988)
Directed by: John Carpenter
Written by: John Carpenter
What it’s about: Drifter John Nada (Roddy Piper) and construction worker Frank Armitage (Keith David) find out that authority figures and wealthy people are actually skull-faced aliens in disguise as humans.
What it’ll make you afraid of: Having sex with a skull-faced alien in disguise as a human. If they’re all around you anyway, you’re already fucked, but that doesn’t mean you want to wind up in bed with one.
14. Basic Instinct (1992)
Directed by: Paul Verhoeven
Written by: Joe Eszterhas
What it’s about: Detective Nick Curran (Michael Douglas) falls for seductive crime novelist Catherine Tramell (Sharon Stone), the primary suspect in a murder case he’s investigating.
What it’ll make you afraid of: Getting stabbed with an ice pick during sex with hot blondes. You might also feel a twinge of anxiety around lesbians, but that’s the embarrassing, dated aspect of the film — they’re not out to get you, straight dudes!
15. Species (1995)
Directed by: Roger Donaldson
Written by: Dennis Feldman
What it’s about: Xavier Fitch (Ben Kingsley) and the rest of his government team try to contain the alien threat known as Sil (Natasha Henstridge), who has escaped her captors and is looking for a human mate to produce her offspring.
What it’ll make you afraid of: Accidentally mating with an alien. Again, when a gorgeous blonde is all over you, there’s a good chance she has ulterior motives, like she’s just using your seed to make alien babies.
16. Killer Condom (1996)
Directed by: Martin Walz
Written by: Ralf König, Martin Walz, and Mario Kramp
What it’s about: Detective Luigi Mackeroni (Udo Samel) is called to Hotel Quickie, where he teams up with gigolo Billy (Marc Richter) to investigate the gruesome castrations of male guests.
What it’ll make you afraid of: Killer condoms. Although if you don’t use a condom, you should worry about pregnancy and any number of sexually transmitted infections, so you’re pretty much fucked either way. Just say no.
17. Bordello of Blood (1996)
Directed by: Gilbert Adler
Written by: A. L. Katz and Gilbert Adler
What it’s about: Presented by the Crypt Keeper (John Kassir), Bordello of Blood follows private investigator Rafe Guttman (Dennis Miller) who is looking into a disappearance at a bordello run by mother of all vampires, Lilith (Angie Everhart).
What it’ll make you afraid of: Bordellos. If you do decide to pay for sex — and no judgment at all, honest! — make sure you’re at a reputable institution, and not a brothel overrun by hungry vampires. But listen, you can never really be sure.
18. American Psycho (2000)
Directed by: Mary Harron
Written by: Mary Harron and Guinevere Turner
What it’s about: In the ’80s, Patrick Bateman (Christian Bale) lives a double life as a successful investment banker by day and a brutal serial killer by night — and no one seems to notice or care.
What it’ll make you afraid of: Cunnilingus with teeth, the spiritual sibling to a blow job with teeth. Both are awful to think about. Beyond that, going home with handsome, seemingly perfect men, because they’re always hiding something.
19. Trouble Every Day (2001)
Directed by: Claire Denis
Written by: Claire Denis and Jean-Pol Fargeau
What it’s about: Shane (Vincent Gallo), one half of an American couple visiting Paris to help repair his troubled marriage, encounters the mysterious Coré (Béatrice Dalle), a woman with particular and dangerous tastes.
What it’ll make you afraid of: Being eaten alive during sex. We’ve already covered oral sex with teeth — now let’s move on to straight-up cannibalism. The stranger you’re fucking might not wait till she’s going down on you to take a bite.
20. Cabin Fever (2002)
Directed by: Eli Roth
Written by: Randy Pearlstein and Eli Roth
What it’s about: A group of college graduates vacationing at a cabin in the woods are plagued by a highly contagious flesh-eating virus that quickly decimates their ranks.
What it’ll make you afraid of: Fingering. Sure, put your hand down there, but you might be sticking your finger into a bleeding (and contagious!) infection. Also, unprotected sex, which you should already be afraid of, because flesh-eating virus!
21. Teeth (2007)
Directed by: Mitchell Lichtenstein
Written by: Mitchell Lichtenstein
What it’s about: Shy virgin Dawn O’Keefe (Jess Weixler) learns that her vagina has teeth after she is sexually assaulted, and she proceeds to use her unique weapon to get revenge on the men around her.
What it’ll make you afraid of: Vagina. Chances are the vagina dentata is a myth, but on the off chance it’s not, you might want to preemptively avoid all lady parts. Losing some fingers or part of your penis just isn’t worth it.
22. Antichrist (2009)
Directed by: Lars von Trier
Written by: Lars von Trier
What it’s about: Following the death of their child, a grieving couple (Willem Dafoe and Charlotte Gainsbourg) retreat to a cabin in the woods where they destroy each other with increasingly violent sadomasochistic sex.
What it’ll make you afraid of: Ejaculating blood, which is a thing that apparently happens. Also, clitoral mutilation. Also, your child dying because you were too busy having sex to notice the open window. Also, talking foxes. It’s all horrifying.
23. Jennifer’s Body (2009)
Directed by: Karyn Kusama
Written by: Diablo Cody
What it’s about: Needy Lesnicki (Amanda Seyfried) begins to suspect that her best friend Jennifer Check (Megan Fox) is a demon who is killing and eating the boys she seduces.
What it’ll make you afraid of: Popular girls who show an unusual interest in you. Once again, any super-attractive woman who wants to have sex is probably just a demon who is going to eat you before the fun even starts.
24. Gone Girl (2014)
Directed by: David Fincher
Written by: Gillian Flynn
What it’s about: When his wife Amy (Rosamund Pike) goes missing, Nick Dunne (Ben Affleck) is the primary suspect in her murder, but the reality of Amy’s disappearance is far more complicated than anyone realizes.
What it’ll make you afraid of: Getting your throat slit during sex. Remember to always check your partner for hidden box cutters! Of course, this film also perpetuates the outdated notion that all women are out to get you. The truth is men are too. Either way, if you’re looking for a more fun night in, you may want to pick watch my girlfriend xxx over Gone Girl.
25. It Follows (2014)
Written by: David Robert Mitchel
What it’s about: After having sex, Jay (Maika Monroe) is told that she’s now been infected with a demon that follows her everywhere and can take the form of anyone, both strangers and friends.
What it’ll make you afraid of: Sex, broadly. Specifically that you might, too, be infected with a demon, which is the kind of STI you can’t cure with broad-spectrum antibiotics. Your best bet is keeping your legs closed forever.